http://FinnWContini.com
It's the best blog post ever, and it's not even my blog post!
It's from Joe Konrath (JA Konrath as he is known on Amazon.com).
I took John Locke's advice on how to become a successful eBook author and Locke's advice set me back about two months. Maybe more. In a nutshell, John Locke's advice is Twitter Twitter Twitter Twitter Twitter. But what worked for Locke has no chance of working for anyone else and Locke knows this, but he's trying to make more money by selling something that's worthless for $5. Locke sold more than a million eBooks in 5 months by peddling his writing on Twitter and using hashtags to do it. Maybe Locke was the first to use hashtags properly -- I don't really know -- but now every Twitter post has hashtags and links and no one is selling anything. You could post a link in which you were giving money away and no one would visit it. Locke's advice is worse than worthless -- it's damaging. Follow his advice and prepare for disappointment.
If one wishes to know how to succeed as a writer, read Konrath's blog post. Live it, breathe it, experience it, and never stop writing:
http://jakonrath.blogspot.com/2011/09/how-to-succeed.html
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Friday, September 23, 2011
Rick Perry's Latest Commercial
http://FinnWContini.com
I hate to give a Republican credit, but I have to give credit where credit is due.
GOP presidential contender Rick Perry produced a great ad, which is on YouTube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EL5Atp_vF0
There's really just one small problem with the way this ad was produced, and you don't have to watch it all the way to see what I saw. Maybe it's just me, but when I look at the Perry for President logo, I see a nuclear explosion (without the mushroom cloud):
That looks like an nuke exploding on the horizon.
Rick Perry is solidly Tea Party, and those whackos honestly believe that when Armageddon happens, they will be raptured up to Heaven while the rest of us will be left to experience hell on Earth. This is one reason why the Republican philosophy is to incite unrest in the Middle East, because it has been prophesied in the Bible that Armageddon will occur in the Mideast.
I think Obama is unfit to lead a parade much less America, but do we really want the Tea Party in charge?
I Love the Smell of Fascism in the Morning, just $0.99.
I hate to give a Republican credit, but I have to give credit where credit is due.
GOP presidential contender Rick Perry produced a great ad, which is on YouTube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EL5Atp_vF0
There's really just one small problem with the way this ad was produced, and you don't have to watch it all the way to see what I saw. Maybe it's just me, but when I look at the Perry for President logo, I see a nuclear explosion (without the mushroom cloud):
That looks like an nuke exploding on the horizon.
Rick Perry is solidly Tea Party, and those whackos honestly believe that when Armageddon happens, they will be raptured up to Heaven while the rest of us will be left to experience hell on Earth. This is one reason why the Republican philosophy is to incite unrest in the Middle East, because it has been prophesied in the Bible that Armageddon will occur in the Mideast.
I think Obama is unfit to lead a parade much less America, but do we really want the Tea Party in charge?
I Love the Smell of Fascism in the Morning, just $0.99.
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
It Really is a Bizarro World
http://FinnWContini.com
I noticed something back in 2004, when I attempted to publish my second satire book, which focused on political humor: Liberals do not support other liberals.
Watch any liberal TV program, which is pretty much limited to MSNBC these days, or listen to any liberal radio program, none of which I can name off the top of my head. There are plenty of liberal channels on YouTube, and liberal blogs aplenty. What is the reaction of those places and sites when contacted by a new and upcoming liberal author? Silence. I offer to send my books to them for free, just to see if they like the writing, and by and large there is no interest.
The message really couldn't be any clearer to an author attempting to write liberal and fact-based humor: We don't care about you, and we're not going to lift a finger to help you spread your message.
The liberal media have circled their collective wagons against the 24/7 assault by the conservative media establishment, yet when a new liberal wishes to join the fight against disinformation, he or she is told that he or she does not matter and we're on our own.
As much as I dislike the conservative media establishment, I do admire one thing about them: They stick together. Whether it's someone who creates a video and posts it to YouTube, creates a new website bashing Obama and his administration, writes a book slamming liberals, or maybe broadcasts a pirate radio station, conservatives rally around that individual to make certain he or she receives as much exposure as possible. While conservatives may throw someone into the deep end to sink or swim, liberals won't even allow someone in the pool for a chance to compete.
Sticking together is an admirable trait. And that's how conservatives have been able to all but assume control of the American media, while liberals huddle in a corner trying to figure out what happened to their media dominance.
I am an equal opportunity humorist. I do not care who I offend when I write, because humor is going to offend some person or some class of people. It's the nature of the beast. And while I love writing humor that ridicules conservatives, the Tea Party and others who are biased, intolerant and racist, I can just as easily switch sides and ridicule liberals, Democrats and Independents.
I'll give the liberal base about six months to support a new writer and at least take a look at what I have to say, but if they continue to betray their base of support with total indifference, get ready to read about Obama's Treehouse in Kenya, where he was born, and his early days of swinging through the trees with all the other monkeys. Unfortunately, that type of racist hatred does have a base of support, and if that's the base I have to write to in order to keep a roof over my head and food on the table, so be it.
I noticed something back in 2004, when I attempted to publish my second satire book, which focused on political humor: Liberals do not support other liberals.
Watch any liberal TV program, which is pretty much limited to MSNBC these days, or listen to any liberal radio program, none of which I can name off the top of my head. There are plenty of liberal channels on YouTube, and liberal blogs aplenty. What is the reaction of those places and sites when contacted by a new and upcoming liberal author? Silence. I offer to send my books to them for free, just to see if they like the writing, and by and large there is no interest.
The message really couldn't be any clearer to an author attempting to write liberal and fact-based humor: We don't care about you, and we're not going to lift a finger to help you spread your message.
The liberal media have circled their collective wagons against the 24/7 assault by the conservative media establishment, yet when a new liberal wishes to join the fight against disinformation, he or she is told that he or she does not matter and we're on our own.
As much as I dislike the conservative media establishment, I do admire one thing about them: They stick together. Whether it's someone who creates a video and posts it to YouTube, creates a new website bashing Obama and his administration, writes a book slamming liberals, or maybe broadcasts a pirate radio station, conservatives rally around that individual to make certain he or she receives as much exposure as possible. While conservatives may throw someone into the deep end to sink or swim, liberals won't even allow someone in the pool for a chance to compete.
Sticking together is an admirable trait. And that's how conservatives have been able to all but assume control of the American media, while liberals huddle in a corner trying to figure out what happened to their media dominance.
I am an equal opportunity humorist. I do not care who I offend when I write, because humor is going to offend some person or some class of people. It's the nature of the beast. And while I love writing humor that ridicules conservatives, the Tea Party and others who are biased, intolerant and racist, I can just as easily switch sides and ridicule liberals, Democrats and Independents.
I'll give the liberal base about six months to support a new writer and at least take a look at what I have to say, but if they continue to betray their base of support with total indifference, get ready to read about Obama's Treehouse in Kenya, where he was born, and his early days of swinging through the trees with all the other monkeys. Unfortunately, that type of racist hatred does have a base of support, and if that's the base I have to write to in order to keep a roof over my head and food on the table, so be it.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Monday, August 29, 2011
Warren Buffett — The Ogre of Omaha
http://FinnWContini.com
http://money.cnn.com/2011/08/26/markets/warren_buffett_bofa_profit/index.htm?hpt=hp_t2
So much for being the Oracle of Omaha, as Buffett is more commonly known.
After reading the link, you'll see Buffett made $357M in one day (paper profits) with his investment in Bank of America.
According to the media, this kind of money made in one day is okay because Buffett is altruistic: He wants higher taxes on himself because his secretary is in a higher tax bracket than him, he "gave" $37 billion to the Gates Foundation, and on and on.
What the media won't tell you is:
1. Warren Buffett practically is the media — he's on the Board of Directors of the Washington Post, along with Melinda Gates, and both wield enormous influence in what news is reported and how it is reported;
2. JP Morgan is rumored to be buying Bank of America. That news privately broke (meaning it did not make the AP wire) less than 60 hours after Buffett made his $5 billion investment in BOA. Buffett bought preferred shares; if JPM buys BOA, common shareholders will be left with nothing, whereas preferred shareholders will be paid in full, with equity in JPM. BOA also pays Buffett $300M a year for 10 years for investing in BOA. Clearly, Buffett knew about the proposed buyout ahead of time, which is why he "invested" $5 billion — he knew it was a sure thing, a risk-free investment, and BOA sweetened the deal to get Buffett's $5 billion so JPM would buy BOA out;
3. Buffett sits on the Board for the Gates Foundation, and the $37 billion he "gave" to Gates in 2007 was so that 95% of that money would be invested and upon which no taxes would be paid on the profits. That's how foundations from billionaires work — their "charitable" foundations are actually their private investment firms;
4. Buffett's calls for the super rich to be taxed more are because he knows that the super rich, like him, will never be taxed more. It's a public relations ploy, and the media, part of which he controls, is eating it up. Millionaires may face higher taxes soon enough, but billionaires write the laws that protect their money forever.
This is why I try not to watch TV — this kind of disinformation is gobbled up by ignorant Americans, and those who get all their news from the TV are the most ignorant of all because they believe the shit that's reported is fact when it's just fiction.
I believe that using insider information is illegal, but billionaires are the elite in the United States, same as the aristocrats of yesteryear. Buffett will never be held accountable for his illegal actions, because he's rich and more powerful than any of us can imagine. For those types of people in America, they are untouchable — our laws, Congressional resolutions, and Supreme Court decisions do not apply to them.
Just ask Bill Gates what the US Federal Court decision in 2000 against Microsoft to break the company into two sections meant to Microsoft: Nothing. Nothing happened, because nothing ever does to this country's coddling of billionaires.
http://Microshafted.com
http://money.cnn.com/2011/08/26/markets/warren_buffett_bofa_profit/index.htm?hpt=hp_t2
So much for being the Oracle of Omaha, as Buffett is more commonly known.
After reading the link, you'll see Buffett made $357M in one day (paper profits) with his investment in Bank of America.
According to the media, this kind of money made in one day is okay because Buffett is altruistic: He wants higher taxes on himself because his secretary is in a higher tax bracket than him, he "gave" $37 billion to the Gates Foundation, and on and on.
What the media won't tell you is:
1. Warren Buffett practically is the media — he's on the Board of Directors of the Washington Post, along with Melinda Gates, and both wield enormous influence in what news is reported and how it is reported;
2. JP Morgan is rumored to be buying Bank of America. That news privately broke (meaning it did not make the AP wire) less than 60 hours after Buffett made his $5 billion investment in BOA. Buffett bought preferred shares; if JPM buys BOA, common shareholders will be left with nothing, whereas preferred shareholders will be paid in full, with equity in JPM. BOA also pays Buffett $300M a year for 10 years for investing in BOA. Clearly, Buffett knew about the proposed buyout ahead of time, which is why he "invested" $5 billion — he knew it was a sure thing, a risk-free investment, and BOA sweetened the deal to get Buffett's $5 billion so JPM would buy BOA out;
3. Buffett sits on the Board for the Gates Foundation, and the $37 billion he "gave" to Gates in 2007 was so that 95% of that money would be invested and upon which no taxes would be paid on the profits. That's how foundations from billionaires work — their "charitable" foundations are actually their private investment firms;
4. Buffett's calls for the super rich to be taxed more are because he knows that the super rich, like him, will never be taxed more. It's a public relations ploy, and the media, part of which he controls, is eating it up. Millionaires may face higher taxes soon enough, but billionaires write the laws that protect their money forever.
This is why I try not to watch TV — this kind of disinformation is gobbled up by ignorant Americans, and those who get all their news from the TV are the most ignorant of all because they believe the shit that's reported is fact when it's just fiction.
I believe that using insider information is illegal, but billionaires are the elite in the United States, same as the aristocrats of yesteryear. Buffett will never be held accountable for his illegal actions, because he's rich and more powerful than any of us can imagine. For those types of people in America, they are untouchable — our laws, Congressional resolutions, and Supreme Court decisions do not apply to them.
Just ask Bill Gates what the US Federal Court decision in 2000 against Microsoft to break the company into two sections meant to Microsoft: Nothing. Nothing happened, because nothing ever does to this country's coddling of billionaires.
http://Microshafted.com
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
VP Joe Biden Visits Japan; Is Irradiated
http://FinnWContini.com
Vice President Joe Biden visited Japan and the contrast between his arrival and departure was striking. Strange that only I was the one who noticed a change in his appearance. I guess radiation really is bad for one's health.
BEFORE:
AFTER:
Political satire for those who can think for themselves:
Friday, August 19, 2011
Christine O’Donnell’s Surprising Primary Victory Speech (from 2010)
http://FinnWContini.com
This is an excerpt from my eBook, Taking Conservatives Behind the Woodshed: The Right Has Never Been So Wrong, available on Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble for just $2.99. Admittedly, it's not one of my better chapters, though if one likes to read over-the-top satire filled with masturbation euphemisms, then this chapter is for you.
Taking Conservatives Behind the Woodshed: The Right Has Never Been So Wrong (on Amazon.com)
Taking Conservatives Behind the Woodshed: The Right Has Never Been So Wrong (on Barnes & Noble -- that is a very long web address!)
This is an excerpt from my eBook, Taking Conservatives Behind the Woodshed: The Right Has Never Been So Wrong, available on Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble for just $2.99. Admittedly, it's not one of my better chapters, though if one likes to read over-the-top satire filled with masturbation euphemisms, then this chapter is for you.
Chapter 19:
Christine O’Donnell’s Surprising Primary Victory Speech
In 2010, Congressman Mike Castle[i] from the state of Delaware ran as the Republican candidate to fill the seat of Former Senator Joe Biden, now Vice President of the United States. Enter Tea Party favorite Christine O’Donnell.[ii]
With the backing of out-of-state money (primarily from the billionaire Koch Brothers, founders of the Tea Party movement), O’Donnell flooded the airwaves insinuating that Mike Castle was gay, despite the fact that Representative Castle has been married to his wife since 1992. O’Donnell kept repeating that Castle wear his “man pants” and “man up.” Castle took the high road in response, but the negative attacks took their toll, and O’Donnell, with her state-wide 34% approval rating, somehow defeated Representative Castle in the Republican primary on September 14, 2010, and became the Republican senatorial challenger to Democrat Chris Coons.
After the primary, Fairleigh Dickenson University’s PublicMind[iii] twice polled Delaware voters, running a hypothetical match-up between Mike Castle and Chris Coons: Republican Castle beat Democrat Coons by a twenty-one-point margin (54%-33%).
O’Donnell was endorsed by the likes of the fanatical Family Research Council, the National Rifle Association, United States Senator Jim DeMint, Sarah Palin, and conservative commentators Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, and Mark Levin. On November 2, 2010, Democrat Chris Coons trounced Christine O’Donnell by 17 points in the general election. The Republicans lost a sure-fire Senate seat because of the Tea Party.
Christine O’Donnell’s claim to fame, besides acknowledging to comedian Bill Maher in 1999 that she once dabbled in witchcraft,[iv] was her stance on masturbation.[v] More to the point, she equated masturbation with adultery and called it “sinful.”
I was able to procure O’Donnell’s September 14, 2010 primary victory speech transcript that she disclosed to her closest friends and supporters. Considering her anti-masturbation mission in life and her belief in the sinfulness of such activity, I found this speech to be, well, more than a little stimulating:
“Thank you, thank you all. This is a wonderful night. I’m sorry I didn’t show up until now, but I’ve been playing the banjo in back. Oh, did you see the finger-painting in the lobby when you came in? That took some effort.
“I’ll take one question right now. What’s that? My favorite movie? It’s Driving Ms. Daisy. Either that or Rubbin Hood, I mean Robin Hood.
“Before I begin, I wish to thank my campaign manager, Hannie Palmer. Double clicking the mouse each and every day for me, along with two finger typing, I don’t know how this campaign would have managed without her. Unfortunately, she’s at home right now, nursing a hatchet wound.
“For those of you who don’t know, I started my career in theater, auditioning the finger puppets. That wasn’t going anywhere, so one day I was sitting in my car, getting a lube job. I had just finished cleaning my fur coat, when it struck me to run for office, and of course it was going to be for the Grand Old Party. Everyone knows the Republican Party is hitchhiking to heaven, and I wanted to be part of that!
“This primary shows that Washington’s not taking care of my business, and we are no longer diddling. I have to tell you, after watching those numbers come in it nearly ruined my eyesight. Winning this primary is such power – I feel like Moses parting the Red Sea. It’s been a real discovery coming into your own. Voters sure were banging the box for me. But we’re diggin’ in for the long stretch. I’m fingering something out, I mean figuring something out, how to beat Chris Coons in November. This victory was earned, but now we’re entering the forest. This isn’t like tiptoeing through the twolips.
“Had we lost, we might have gotten trigger happy. You know, resorting to hand to gland combat. But we are revving the engine! We wrestled that one-eyed monster Mike Castle to the ground. This time tomorrow, he’ll be off painting the ceiling or going fishing with the man in the boat. But we can’t rest! No, we can’t polish the pearl just yet.
“Some of my younger supporters might be thinking about shuffling your iPod, or maybe some of my more mature supporters will be spinnin’ a record tonight. But this isn’t the 1990s – we’re not slicking Willie these days and the two-finger tango will have to wait.
“Having said that, this might surprise some of you, but there’s no sense beating around the bush. I’m exhausted and I need some time off. Next week I’m going deep sea diving and then will be swimming in the Poon-Tang River. And after that I’ll be doing some indoor fishing or going mining. Shining the diamond is a real possibility there. I might go spelunking in the mystery cave, or possibly visiting Niagara Falls to unwind for a day. But the most relaxing time I have ever known is a night in with the girls.
“Oh, I understand we’re having some issues with the central computer. We’re going to try a manual override, but in the meantime we’re checking the status of the In/Out port. And I’ve just been told that security is searching for Ms. ‘G’ so whoever that is, please see them.
“This night’s just getting started, and we have refreshments and a buffet in back for all those who are hungry now. We’re having ladyfingers and cream, among other things. Juicing Lucy has been busy all day. I know she’s been hand tossing the tuna salad, peeling the peach, soaking the whisker biscuit, steaming the oyster, seasoning your fish, and shucking the fresh water clam. She’s been stirring the honey pot, that’s for sure. We ran out of gloves, so don’t catch her touching your tuna. Unfortunately, we only have clambake for one, so hurry back there!
“Enough of the applause – you’re making my girl happy!”[vi]
Chapter 19 – Christine O’Donnell’s Surprising Primary Victory Speech:
[i] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Castle
[ii] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christine_O’Donnell
[iii] http://publicmind.fdu.edu/winsome/final.pdf
[iv] http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2010/sep/20/christine-o-donnell-dabbled-witchcraft
[v] http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2010/sep/15/christine-odonnell-tea-party-interview
[vi] For the record, her victory speech contained fifty-eight euphemisms to masturbation. How shameful!
_____________________________________________
Taking Conservatives Behind the Woodshed: The Right Has Never Been So Wrong (on Barnes & Noble -- that is a very long web address!)
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